Section 1.1 Defining Control

What does it really mean to have control? According to Oxford Languages, control is defined as the ability to affect or manage the behavior of others or the progression of events. In our modern society, achieving complete control over every aspect of our lives seems increasingly difficult.

In essence, living in a free society often requires us to relinquish some control to governmental structures. We do not retain full ownership of our earnings, as taxes are imposed at various levels on our income and purchases. Unfortunately, we also have limited oversight regarding how those taxes are utilized, which can be disheartening. While voting provides us with some control, the rampant political corruption often undermines its effectiveness. Nevertheless, we should not let this diminish our right to vote.

Beyond governmental constraints, we must shift our focus to the elements we can manage in our lives. Here are some key aspects we can control:

• The individuals we choose to follow
• The people we allow into our lives
• Our future paths
• Our personal habits
• Our mindset and attitude
• Our work ethic
• Our financial decisions
• Our commitment to learning and growth
• Our dietary choices
• Our health practices

While this is not an exhaustive list, it prompts an important question: Who truly governs the most significant aspect of our existence—our identity and personal development? Are you actively participating in shaping who you are, or have you ceded that responsibility to others?

Section 1.2 Leading Your Own Life

Everyone has mentors or figures they look up to. The critical question is whether we are choosing the right people to follow. It is perfectly acceptable for a partner who cares for you to influence your decisions, as their guidance can often be beneficial.

“Blessed is the influence of one true, loving human soul on another.” — George Eliot

From a Christian perspective, following spiritual leaders can be a positive influence, provided their intentions align with your own. Mature individuals tend to gravitate towards those who have their best interests at heart. However, are you inadvertently following individuals who may not wish you well? If so, you are allowing them the power to influence your life.

As Jim Rohn famously stated, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Reflect on the company you keep. Are they individuals you aspire to emulate? What level of influence do they have over you? If they lack genuine concern for your well-being, it may be time to reevaluate those relationships.

Section 1.3 Taking Charge of Your Decisions

Ultimately, the choices you make, whether they are beneficial or detrimental, rest solely on your shoulders. You control who can influence your life, even if that control is sometimes subconscious. If you are unclear about your influences, consider asking yourself:

• Who are the five people I spend the most time with?
• Who do I respect the most?
• Who do I listen to regularly?
• Who do I communicate with frequently?
• Who genuinely has my best interests at heart?
• Are there individuals in my life I should distance myself from?

By answering these questions, you empower yourself to manage who shapes your life. As you reflect, also ponder how often your daily choices are made deliberately versus haphazardly.

In the end, you are solely responsible for your life’s outcome.