Finding Clarity in a Chaotic World: A Journey Through Life
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Chapter 1: A Morning of Promise and Distraction
On a bright and chilly winter morning, I awoke to a day brimming with potential. However, I was soon derailed by a barrage of news articles, opinion pieces, and critiques highlighting the world's many issues. It made me question the value of it all — a question I find myself asking often.
If you’re looking for a quick fix to life’s complexities in a brief five-minute read, you may want to look elsewhere. I don’t claim to have the solutions to our fractured culture, corrupt political landscape, environmental crises, or economic disparities. I certainly don’t have six steps to change it all, nor can I provide a simple guide to enlightenment. Life’s intricacies cannot be neatly packaged into catchy phrases or shallow insights.
I am merely attempting to navigate my way back into the light. Perhaps you, too, feel lost in the darkness, aimlessly wandering without direction. As the song suggests, it’s tough to leave when the exit remains hidden. Let's explore this journey together.
One of the first pieces I stumbled upon this morning was an article boasting five life lessons learned from a 3,500-mile bike journey across America. My initial reaction was disbelief that such an extensive experience could be condensed into just five points. I had to see it for myself.
Interestingly, articles like this are plentiful on platforms like Medium. While they may vary in scope — some focus on Canada or specific states — it seems many derive joy from long-distance cycling and subsequently penning their reflections. Who knew?
As I skimmed through the article, I encountered predictable observations: America is stunning, diverse, and some roads can be treacherous. The ride was tough yet achievable, and ultimately, it’s the journey that matters, not the destination. I found myself feeling underwhelmed.
I don’t intend to disparage the writer (though it may seem that way). Who knows? Perhaps they are crafting a comprehensive book filled with valuable insights, or this was just a preliminary attempt. However, it’s hard to fathom distilling such a rich experience into a seven-minute read while omitting significant and meaningful elements.
Is this what I’m doing?
What are we all doing? Are we merely whining like spoiled children, pretending to have it all figured out, or producing uninspiring content that lacks depth? The mainstream media feels repetitive, biased, and dull, while independent writers seem more focused on notoriety than substance, often targeting those who are doing the very jobs they secretly covet within the mainstream.
What was I scrolling through? A collection of despair, tutorials, travel logs, critiques, advice, mediocre poetry, reviews, genre fiction, and stale satire. It hardly reflects a promising display of literary skill or human understanding.
This was exacerbated by the fact that I had contributed to some of it myself.
Section 1.1: The Struggle for Sanity
Have you ever tried to balance on a log in water? It’s akin to attempting to stand in a hammock. Without complete focus and muscle engagement, you’ll quickly find yourself submerged. This encapsulates my sense of sanity these days. When I’m attentive and doing everything right, the world feels manageable. But the moment my gaze drifts, I’m flipped upside down and lost once more.
In this age of overwhelming information access, where we know what everyone is creating and expressing, originality feels dauntingly elusive. What hasn’t been said or done? I’m not interested in being unique for its own sake; I seek basic originality. I don’t wish to stand out for the sake of it; I simply don’t want to be ordinary.
I once believed my emotional fluctuations stemmed from my drinking habits — swinging from elation to sadness, with periods of numbness in between. After a year of sobriety, I realized that many of these shifts were a natural part of who I am.
What did I say to that individual? Did I embarrass myself? Offend them? Why did I think those travel plans were appealing? Why was I initially excited, only to find myself indifferent now? How will I feel tomorrow? Who knows? And what was that person’s name again?
Section 1.2: Finding Inspiration
Today, I spent some time browsing clay sculptures on Pinterest. I have a block of clay waiting for me, and I know exactly what I want to create. I’m allowing the idea to develop until I’m ready to begin. At least it provided a distraction. I find Pinterest to be an excellent source of inspiration, provided it’s used sparingly. This may seem contradictory, but it’s true.
Just a few years ago, I was exploring numerous creative outlets: photography, filmmaking, graphic design, creative writing, and journalism. Whenever I felt stifled or frustrated in one area, I would simply switch to another.
Bored of photographing models? Write a story. Tired of storytelling? Make a film. Over filmmaking? Start a magazine. I was never short on creative endeavors, as each required different parts of my brain and skill sets.
Over time, I lost interest in everything except writing. The effort it takes to coordinate with other creative individuals often felt like herding cats. It was more appealing to focus solely on writing.
Perhaps this is what I’m missing now. I’ve invested all my energy into writing and lack an outlet for other creative pursuits. I suppose that’s what the clay project is for.
Chapter 2: The Idea of Running for Sheriff
I’ve often thought it would be amusing to run for County Sheriff and even more amusing to win. Typically, candidates are current law enforcement officers, and they rarely belong to the Democratic Party. Usually, it’s two Republican candidates vying for the same position. Their ideologies often align; it’s simply a matter of popularity or connections.
Not only do I have no background in law enforcement, but I also don’t own a gun. Strangely enough, these factors don’t disqualify one from being elected sheriff. It’s reminiscent of how judges can be elected without legal expertise.
Ideas like this often lead me into trouble. I hold roles as both a clergyman and a notary public, yet I rarely promote these services, making the likelihood of utilizing them virtually nonexistent. Why did I pursue this? It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I’ve officiated a few weddings and notarized some documents. I possess a collared shirt and a notary stamp with my identification. I even gave a blessing at a party once.
I enjoy the concept of creating but have no desire to manage any operations. I have countless ideas for businesses, yet I lack the motivation to run one. I know too much and get bored too easily; it all feels like too much work.
This is likely why writing appeals to me.
For me, writing serves as a medium for conveying ideas, rather than being the focal point itself. When I write a story, it’s about the narrative, not the writing process. In discussing politics, it’s about the policies or the individuals involved, not the writing itself. This is why I have no interest in discussing writing techniques or tools. Mechanics don’t sit around discussing wrenches, right?
This brings me full circle to a piece I composed a few weeks ago concerning significant ideas. It’s essential to seek ideas, not merely topics. I began writing about politics after witnessing the absurdity of electing a game show host to the highest office. I write about religion due to my upbringing and its evolution. I’m intrigued by the resilience of humanity, even if I find most people intolerable. If I’m doing it correctly, I don’t focus on anything specific; I communicate ideas.
And that’s how I navigated through it all. Just twelve hours later.
Peace.
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